I think I have pretty much always talked to myself.
But when I was a kid and a teenager, I started worrying and kept it very much to myself, because it felt like the environment around me always suggested that "Talking to yourself is for crazy people and for when you are senile and old."
The Things we Worry About
Not wanting to be considered crazy, I became quite hypervigilant about making absolutely sure nobody was within earshot — or could see my lips moving — when I would have "conversations with myself."
Fortunately, it was my auntie who was the first one who "caught me" talking to myself. Much to my surprise, she was very benign in her reaction. She happened to pass by my room with some laundry, as I was in the middle of a long discussion with myself.
Spring is here!
"I heard talking. Who were you talking to?"
Nobody... I was mortified at having been caught...
"I guess that means I'm a little crazy, right?" I offered.
"Oh nonsense! ALL intelligent beings talk to themselves!"
So then we went on to having a bit of a talk about exactly who it was that came up with the idea that if you talk to yourself, you must be a little nuts. Insane. Off the rails.
Then — in the general sort of way that could be readily grasped by an 11-year old — we agreed that it likely wasn't so much the actual talking to yourself that was a problems, as the fact that some people (the ones who decided it means you're nuts) simply are uncomfortable with the idea of others — in essence — "thinking out loud." Because that was really what this "taking" was: thinking.
Problem Solving
My auntie talked about her own "talking to herself" and explained how it was a helpful way for her to work through solving problems.
She also explained that the "mainstream" assertion that talking to yourself was a sign that you were lonely and had nobody else to talk to was nonsense... because much of what people "talk to themselves" about were deeply private matters they were very unlikely to share with anyone else.
Not an "Introvert Thing..."
Later in life — as I got more involved in the study of psychology and human motivation — I started to think that maybe the whole issue of talking to yourself was "an introvert thing," because many introverts prefer their own company to that of others... but that also didn't seem to hold water. After all our neighbor — who was basically a "babbling brook" extravert — would also talk to herself extensively.
My other always gave her a free pass, insisting that she was just "talking to the plants" in her garden, while gardening.
Much like my auntie, talking to myself is a personal problem solving tool. Exactly why it's easier to say things out loud rather than just think them is still unclear to me... except I surmise that "vocalizing" activates a different part of the brain than thinking, just like writing and talking are both communication, but use different parts of the brain.
The Mental Health Bias
With many years of hindsight to my benefit, I expect that the whole "insanity" bias is no more than a lumping together of the sort "talking to yourself" MOST people engage in with people who are schizophrenic and literally hear voices with whom they are having full-on conversations.
The people I know who talk to themselves are typically well aware that they are personally both asking and answering the questions!
There is no other "them" or "voices" prompting the conversation.
In some ways, I have become very appreciative of our modern times... these days, nobody gives you a second glance when you're having an intense debate with yourself in the car; they simply assume you're on a hands-free cellphone.
Making it Useful!
As a bit of a "confession" to end this with, I'll happily admit that a large number of my blog posts here begin as "conversations with myself" that evolve into my having the thought "This would actually make a pretty cool blog post!"
Two of the places I most often talk to myself is in the kitchen while cooking breakfast... and while gardening, especially mowing the lawn. And many interesting ideas grow out of those "conversations!"
Thanks for reading, and have a great remainder of your day!
How about YOU? Do you talk to yourself? If so, do you find it a good way to brainstorm or problem solve? If not, do you think it's "weird" — or even a sign of mental illness — that people talk to themselves? Comments, feedback and other interaction is invited and welcomed! Because — after all — SOCIAL content is about interacting, right? Leave a comment — share your experiences — be part of the conversation!
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Created at 20220324 16:06 PDT
0531/1777
