Offense taken turns into offense given; mutual building of emotional obstacles. Modern culture is superb at offense-taking, looking for insult in intentions, interpreting malice into events. Something upsets everyone, therefore constructing barriers dividing us into ever more distinct camps. That offends me becomes conversation-ender, fence erected immediately.
Some crimes call for fences, barriers guarding against actual damage instead of dreamed insults. The fence dividing respect from disrespect, safety from abuse. Some offense safeguards needed dignity; not all of it is performative. The difficulty is determining which fences actually help and which just split. Are we separating ourselves or protecting ourselves? Creating jails or establishing essential boundaries.
Offensive fences need attention. Held grudges turn habitual, offenses recalled long after offenders forgot. Eventually the fence becomes identity, defining ourselves by what offended us rather than who we actually are.