That's how most days feel if you're being truthful. Not all things are dark; not everything is brilliant. It is that bizarre middle where you are persuading yourself you are okay even when something feels a little odd.
You wake up with ideas, vitality, perhaps even some motivation. Then a little event takes place. The anticipated message is not delivered. A plan alters direction. Moods drop for no apparent cause. The "good" you were clinging onto begins sliding through your fingers all of a sudden.
You are now trapped in that silent argument inside your thoughts. . But occasionally it seems unnatural, much as donning too large or too small clothing. Though internally exhausted of pretending, you work to keep it on since that is what is expected.
Still, not everything is bad either.A time of calm. A note that events are not totally disintegrating.
Therefore, you seat with both. The advantages and the not as good. The weariness and the energy. The hope and the uncertainty.
That perhaps is the true definition of optimism. Choosing to keep going even when it is not, not acting like everything is perfect.