Define it? Isn't that always the question? People prefer a clear answer that they can circle or underline. "What do you mean? " "How do you feel? " "Where do you stand? " Define it. As if life, emotions, and decisions could be summed up in a few simple words.
But what if I don't have the right words?
What if I'm still trying to figure things out?
Some things cannot be defined in the moment. They require time to develop, stretch, fall apart, and come back together. Take emotions, for example—have you ever tried to explain why you miss someone who no longer knows you? Or why you're happy and sad at the same time? Define it? It is not always feasible.
We are under pressure to define love, relationships, careers, and even ourselves. As if who I am now is fixed and finished. But I'm not a statement. I'm not a label. I am changing. Evolving. Feeling one way this morning and another way at night.
There is a certain type of beauty in not defining everything too soon. It allows for uncertainty, development, and depth. It allows us to sit with experiences without rushing to label them.
So perhaps the goal is not always to define it.
Perhaps the point is to experience it.
To be in it.
To live through it, even when it is chaotic or uncertain.
And if someone asks again, "Define it," perhaps I'll say this:
"It's real. It's mine. “I might not have the words for it yet—but I know it matters. ”
