It's finally day four of the challenge and I bet this topic is one of the most avoided ones, but I'm glad to see some people taking up day four's challenge. :)
The challenge is "Your relationship. If single, discuss single life."
Well, I'm single... and I'm an NBSB for the past 29 years. NBSB means "No Boyfriend Since Birth". Yes, I have never been in a relationship.
There are times when people ask me why I haven't been in a relationship, I just playfully answer them, "Because no one made a mistake of choosing me." haha
Well, I did have some suitors. The first one was in high school, but my parents were against me being in a relationship because I was young and I had to focus on my studies. Actually, I don't know that person that much as well and I guess my mind was full of other things like school, friends and just having fun.
The same happened when I was in University. Being in a relationship was never on my mind. My male best friend even helped me out by saying, "If someone bugs you, you can tell them that we're together so they'd stop." Wasn't he a great best friend? Funny thing was I used to have a crush on him in high school, but that was only for a while... and when we were in University, we found out that the feeling was mutual. The feeling we had in high school was just fleeting, though. Infatuation, that was what it was.
Here's a photo of me and my best friend on his wedding day. <3
Have I ever fallen in love?
A Story of You and Me The first time we met was interesting I enjoyed your company as a very close friend And at one point, you fell in love Our relationship changed and it felt so weird I tried to create a chance to talk to you My friend told me that you confided I told you my worries; and your girl's dagger eyes The closeness we used to have once again flourished The time to finally be apart slowly and inevitably came You bid goodbye to some friends and acquaintances The next day was our whole last day together I tried not to cry as I read your letter You patted my head gently and heaved a sigh The fireworks that night was extra special for me At the airport, you were teary-eyed My way home that day felt the longest It has been six long years since then I'm really glad to have met you in this life Through the years, we stayed connected A stolen shot taken by my friend during our friend's wedding. He went there with me. :)
Well, I have. I made a poem about this story before, but I'd like to share it here. So feel free to read below or CLICK HERE.
The questions we asked worth reminiscing
We immediately clicked more than I expected
Several people and things made us more connected
To spend more time and create memories; we both intend
But along the way, my heart has changed
Though none of this, I intentionally arranged
Not with me, but to a pretty dove
I felt lonely, but I chose to give way
For I know from the start, you wouldn't stay
So I tried to avoid you until my hurt disappeared
I thought you were happy and that you're OK
But I thought wrong as I saw you smile less day by day
I wanted to know the reason why you're blue
I was lowkey hoping it was because of me
I know it's stupid; how honest could I be?
You're depressed coz our connection ended
I gathered my strength and asked you straight
Not able to spend time with me, caused you this state
You told me not to worry coz your relationship, like time, flies
You admitted breaking up with her the night before
But the reason remained behind a close door
Every time we spent together, we happily cherished
It was a special bond we shared to each other
Although people around us believed we're romantically together
Like other things, it'll end all the same
So in a letter, I gave it my all and expressed my feelings
Coz I know for a fact that you'll soon be leaving
For there will soon be changes and distances
You gave everyone a performance you heartily prepared
It's a proof of your gratitude; I know you really cared
We had breakfast; a heart-to-heart talk that could go on forever
Suddenly, tears ran down from your beautiful eyes
You handed me a letter; I felt my heart rate rise
But stopping it won't make me feel better
You then started singing a song of goodbye
Cried my heart out; I could no longer lie
We decided to make another memory under the sky
That night we went to a festival and laughed a lot
Tried to cherish the time we still have got
I saw impressive sea of lights with you; embraced by glee
But the next day... is the day I didn't want to come
For it's time to return to where you came from
I would've punched you if you cried
That day was the last time your eyes met mine
When I felt your warm embrace; I know it'll be fine
Everything has been hitting me the strongest
You're no longer beside me; I felt lonely
I just cried... reminiscing our memories silently
But I'm still hoping to see you again
The feelings we once had for each other might have changed
But the bond we have shared remains unchanged
I would gladly meet you again in our afterlife
I know I have expected something to happen
But what we have now is better than I imagined
Though some feelings eventually ended
I'm just grateful that for me you were always there
You have unceasingly made me feel that you truly care
Six years ago, I met him in the English Academy where I used to work for. He wasn't my student, but I was introduced to him by one of my students. We happened to click, so we decided to hangout and eventually I developed feelings for him. It wasn't difficult to like him at all.
When he was about to go back to Japan, he gave me a letter... and in that letter, he told me his feelings and that he wanted us to keep in touch. We are still keeping in touch until now.
There was one time when I asked him what he thinks about being in a relationship. All he answered me was that, he's not ready to be in a relationship yet. He wants to be a great man first before committing and stuff like that. It was inspiring... he is inspiring!
Before the pandemic, he told me that he's visiting us in 2022. He's planning to start his own company this year, so he's living his dreams. He had to postpone though because of the pandemic, but he said he will still realize it. It would be nice to see him again.
After him, I haven't been romantically attracted to someone else. It doesn't mean that I'm still in love with him, though. I have accepted the fact that we will never be romantically involved and we'd just consider ourselves friends, or family. :)
Despite my failed love story, I still feel loved. I have my parents with me, my friends and other special people in my life. I learned to love myself more and focus more on my family.
Of course, I'm not closing the door to love again, but I doubt it would be soon. Perhaps in the far future? haha Who knows?
And that ends my day four! :) Thanks for reading... See you tomorrow! ^^