As of late, I haven't exactly been feeling very inspired to do much, as I start my days.
Seems like (my) life comes and goes in cycles... sometimes I am "up" and feel extremely active and able to cope; sometimes I feel "down" and like everything I contemplate is just so... overwhelming. Sometimes these cycles are days apart, sometimes they are months apart...
We Know it Happens... but WHY?
I'm not describing anything terribly unusual; my guess is that at least half the people reading these words have experienced something similar.
But why do these ebbs and flows happen?
For me, understanding the "why" has to with how — in an ideal world — I'd like my world to be, and then comparing that ideal to how my world actually is.
I'm not going to philosophize about an "ideal" world in which I can just sit still on a beach and sip tropical drinks with little umbrellas in them while the external world takes care of itself. I'm just going to consider the actual world, as it current exists — one that requires dealing with work, bills, maintenance, dodgy relationships and so forth.
It Would be Nice IF...
I don't mind working; I especially don't mind working if I am doing something that feels meaningful and rewarding in some fashion that combines the physical/tangible with the emotional/intangible.
Time has a lot to do with it, too.
I like to work on something — and I am willing to work long and hard — and see it through... and then have time to sit down and look at what I accomplished and reflect on what I did, and what went into it. There is a reward in having time to do something well, and then a reward in getting some kind of overall "compensation" (monetary, psychological, emotional, physical) that feels proportionate to the effort put in.
As I have mentioned before, I tend to be somewhat of a "slow processor," and along with that I am also rather a sequential processor: I am most comfortable with focusing on one thing, getting "in the zone," and completing it.
Once I have fully "processed" one piece of work or a project, then I'm ready to consider and undertake the next one.
A World Out of Balance?
But that's not how the "real world" works... or so they tell me.
And that's where I start to feel UN-motivated.
That "real world" feels like eternally running late for a train — a series of trains, actually — on a long trip where you never have time enough, and you're always out of breath. Even while trying to focus on what you're currently doing, you already have to have planning going in your head for the next five things that must be taken care of... even while being conscious of the fact that you'll like have to abandon some of them.
"Back in the day" I would liken it to being in charge of many boats, all of which had slow leaks somewhere. You can definitely bail enough water from any one boat to keep it floating, but while you are bailing "Boat A," boats B, C and D are slowly sinking. So you start bailing "Boat B" because it's getting critical, and then Boat A starts slowly sinking, again.
Meanwhile, all the boat builder has to offer is "nice job, here's $20!" and that's definitely not enough to order Door Dash or Uber Eats so you can continue bailing while you're also trying to eat. So not only are the boats sinking, you are sinking, as well!
Letting the Boats Sink?
Feeling uninspired and demotivated often results from being a situation of protracted "futility," meaning that you're constantly playing "catch-up," and you feel like you don't really have the capacity to "gain on it," and meanwhile, you don't even have the opportunity to rest for even a few moments (because your metaphorical "boats" are sinking) and your rewards (across the entire spectrum from monetary to psychological) for all your efforts feel like a lot less than the effort you are putting out.
And so, you look at the world and realize that your effective choices are either to "drown quickly" if you just give up, or "drown slowly" if you keep going.
Regardless of which you choose, the end result is still "drowning."
In most cases, the human mind is not capable of staying inspired in the face of such scenarios; hence that feeling of lethargic DE-motivation sets in.
Back to "Inspiration"...
When we feel uninspired and like life is futile, it's important to understand what we want our life to look like, not just recognize that what we currently have is not what we want.
Defining what we want in terms of what we don't want is tricky business at the best of times, because the psychological underpinnings of that is that we end up "running away from" what we don't want, rather than "running TOWARDS" what we do want.
The distinction may sound insignificant, but it isn't!
If we don't focus on what we actually want, we risk just running from one "sinking boat" to the next, without much plan or purpose. Often what's needed is a complete change in our approach... and that much-needed inspiration shows up again when we enjoy a couple of (even small) successes.
The World in Which We Live...
Whereas we're all ultimately accountable for our own happiness, we do also live in a world where "doing our best" often isn't enough. And that presents a challenge to staying inspired.
Consider that even here in the USA, more than half the nation's households live in a state of not feeling certain they'll be able to pay their basic essential bills in any given month. As a very poignant example... once I get this post out, I will be paying our water bill. And my "options" right now is put it on a credit card... or be shut off.
In the end, finding inspiration is often contingent on the outcome being one we feel is worthwhile; one that makes us feel like we have improved the situation. Absent that? Inspiration can be tough to find!
Thanks for reading, and have a great week ahead!
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Created at 20221002 23:56 PDT
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